Preparing a Toddler for a New Baby: Play, Books and Gentle Routines

A new baby is a joyful event, but for an older sibling it can also be a big change. A toddler who has been the centre of the family's attention suddenly has to share it. They may feel excited, curious, jealous, confused, or all of these at once.

This guide offers gentle, play-based ways to prepare a toddler for a new brother or sister, and to support them once the baby arrives. Every child and family is different. If you are worried about your child's wellbeing, speak to your doctor or health visitor.

Talk about it simply

Toddlers do not understand time well, so telling them very early may not mean much. Many families wait until the bump is visible or until a few months before the birth. Use simple words: a baby is growing in Mummy's tummy. The baby will be very small and will cry, sleep and drink milk.

Read books together

Books about new babies and becoming a big brother or sister help toddlers imagine what is coming. Look at pictures of babies and talk about what they need. Our guide to choosing first books has tips on finding good ones. Looking at photos of your toddler as a baby can be fun too.

Caring play with a doll

Many families give a toddler a doll of their own before the new baby arrives. They can practise holding, feeding, bathing and rocking it. Our article on dolls and soft toys for caring play explains why this kind of play matters. After the birth, your toddler can care for their baby while you care for yours.

Make changes early

If your toddler will move to a new bed, start childcare or give up something like a cot, try to make these changes well before the baby arrives, or wait until things have settled. This way, they are less likely to feel pushed out by the baby. Our guide to starting childcare in Malta has more on easing transitions.

Keep routines steady

Toddlers find comfort in familiar routines. Keeping mealtimes, naps and bedtime as consistent as possible helps them feel secure. A screen-free bedtime routine can stay the same even when everything else is changing.

Meeting the baby

When your toddler first meets the baby, try to have your arms free to hug them. Some families arrange for the baby to give the toddler a small gift. A book, a doll or a set of wooden animals works well. Our article on gifts for baby number two has more ideas, including gifts visitors can bring for the older child.

Include your toddler

Let your toddler help in small ways: fetching a nappy, choosing the baby's clothes, singing a song. Praise their help. Talk to the baby about their big sibling: look, your big sister is here. Little moments like this help a toddler feel important.

Special time

Try to spend a little time each day with your toddler alone, even ten minutes. Read a book, build a block tower or go for a walk. Grandparents and family can help by taking the toddler out for special outings. Our guide to a play basket for Nanna's house suggests ways to make those visits fun.

Activities for feeding times

Feeding a newborn takes a lot of time, and toddlers may feel left out. A special basket of toys that only comes out during feeds can help. Fill it with quiet activities: books, a puzzle, stacking cups, play dough. Our article on quiet time activities has ideas. Reading a book to your toddler while you feed is another lovely option.

Expect big feelings

It is normal for toddlers to feel jealous or upset, and to show it through tantrums, clinginess or going back to babyish behaviour. Stay calm and offer comfort. Name their feelings: you are feeling cross because the baby needs Mummy. Our article on a calm corner for big feelings has more ideas.

Toys for both

Some toys can be shared as the baby grows. Stacking cups, soft balls and play silks are good for siblings of different ages. Keep small parts from the toddler's toys away from the baby, as described in why babies put everything in their mouths.

Look after yourself

Caring for a toddler and a newborn is demanding. Accept help from family and friends. In Malta, family often lives nearby, and many grandparents are happy to help. Our article on gifts for new parents suggests ways friends can support you.

When visitors come

In the first weeks, visitors often focus on the new baby. You can gently ask close family and friends to greet the older child first. A small gift or simply a few minutes of play with the big brother or sister makes a huge difference. Our gifts for new parents guide suggests ways visitors can help the whole family.

Little Curio is curating plastic-free toys for babies, toddlers and siblings in Malta; see what is coming.